LOU RAWLS - January 6

Sings like a natural (dead) man.
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SHELLEY WINTERS - January 14

The Prone-Sleeping Adventure.
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WILSON PICKETT - January 19

Another singer finds a place to stick it.
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TONY FRANCIOSA - January 19

Actor who used Shelley Winters as an easy lay.
Oddly years later follows her in death by 5 days.
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CHRIS PENN - January 24

Star of Darwin Awards movie, and also it's best candidate.
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AL LEWIS - February 3

Leo Schnauzer and Grandpa Munster,
both of you great ones should R.I.P.
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FRANKLIN COVER - February 5

That interracial marriage guy on The Jeffersons.
(Now he's that dead guy on his back.)
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CURT GOWDY - February 20

This sportscaster's looking quite dowdy.
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DON KNOTTS, DENNIS WEAVER, DARREN MCGAVIN - February 24

Technically McGavin didn't expire until the 25th,
but it was still in the same 24 hour period as the other two.
All three "they always go in threes" celebs croaking within 24 hours?
This has to be some kind of obit record!
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OTIS CHANDLER - February 27

He ran the L.A. Times... into the ground.

Now this nepotism nerd is likewise.
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JACK WILD - March 1

Timmy, you shoulda stuck to that flute
instead of playing on a bong full of toot.
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KIRBY PUCKET - March 6

His career soared high until he lost an eye,
so Kirby Pucket went and kicked the bucket.
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GORDON PARKS - March 7

Shaft director at 93 finally parks and gets the shaft.
__________________________________________________

MAUREEN STAPLETON - March 13

The Gingerbread Lady crumbles.
(Nowadays Mo is feelin' kinda low.)
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BUCK OWENS - March 25

Got a serious case of the goins.
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STEVE HOWE - April 28

As in Howe the heck did this dope-headed Dodger pitcher
live so darn long after snorting up all those piles of coke?
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JOHN KENNETH GALBRAITH - April 29

John Kroaked Gonebreath.
__________________________________________________

LOUIS RUKEYSER - May 2

TV financial guru now has plenty of meditating time.
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FLOYD PATTERSON - May 11

Make that Flat Flatterson.
(Yet another pug that Ali outlived.)
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BILLY PRESTON - June 6

Nothin' from nothin' is... now Billy.
__________________________________________________

ROBERT DONNER - June 8

Exidor exits out da door.
(Ya, calm down - we said Robert Donner, not Robert Downey.)
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AARON SPELLING - June 23

Charlie's Angels producer becomes an angel himself.
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PATSY RAMSEY - June 24

One of her boyfriends (who she wouldn't squeal on)
was the "family friend" that killed her kid Jon Benet.
Now everybody welcome Hell's newest mom -
Miss Cancer Crone 2006 - hooray!
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JAN MURRAY - July 2

Jokin' Jan just jetted outta here.
Later on, laughin' boy!
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JUNE ALLYSON - July 8

At least that constant annoying whining and crying will finally stop.
(Which some people called acting.)
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BARNARD HUGHES - July 11

The bargain basement Barry Fitzgerald.
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RED BUTTONS - July 13

Yep, looks like Red finally popped his buttons.
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MICKEY SPILLANE - July 17

Our boy Mickey
was mighty tricky
but even he couldn't out-write
the Grim Reaper thug, that thief in the night.
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JACK WARDEN - JuLY 19

They once said he was crazy like a fox.
Now they say he's croaked like a flounder.
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MIKE DOUGLAS - August 11

No relation to Kirk Douglas or his sterling clan,
but he hosted a nice talk show for quite a long span.
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BRUNO KIRBY - August 14

You know, kicked to the curby.
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JON DOUGH - August 27

Most poons join porn to make some extra dough.
But in this case Dough joined porn to make some extra poon.
Where were we? Oh, ya - either way, now he's one stiff-looking stiff.
COD: Suicide by hanging.
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GLENN FORD - August 30

Always looked bored.
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STEVE IRWIN - September 4

It was Labor Day, but that stingray sure as hell didn't take the day off.
Crikey, that stingray was spikey!
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FREDDY FENDER - October 14

Final and fatal, it's... Fender's fender-bender ender!

And I swear if those crummy jukebox bars play
Way-haysted Day-hays And Way-haysted Nih-hites
just one more damn time, I'm gonna pay-huke!
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JANE WYATT - October 20

She co-starred in the classic TV sitcom Father Knows Best, it's true.
But really, didn't mother know more than a few things, too?
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ARTHUR HILL - October 22

Now our Owen Marshall buddy Hill is buried under one.
(It's also a bad month to have played an Owen or be named Owens.)
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JOE NIEKRO - October 27

Baseball's king of the knuckleballs finally knuckles under.
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ED BRADLEY - November 9

One of the best guys 60 Minutes will ever have.
You didn't do too badly, Mr. Bradley.
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JACK PALANCE - November 10

Just lost his balance.
Believe it or plot.
Meaning that he's not only tired,
but... ah... expired.
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MILTON FRIEDMAN - November 16

Sure was easy for him to be an "economist" about everyone elses' money -
the old coot wasn't gonna be around long enough to worry about it!
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RUTH BROWN - November 17

Done got put down.
(Geez, that was one tough blues broad.)
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ROBERT ALTMAN - November 21

This dull director is thankfully at a permanent halt, man.
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PETER BOYLE - December 12

Finally boiled over.
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AHMET ERTEGUN - December 14

I met Ertegun? The guy who started Atlantic Records?
No, I didn't - and now it's way too late to do so.
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JOE BARBERA - December 18

Scobby Doo, where are you? Beats me, but I do know that this
Hanna-Barbera founder is now an undergrounder. Right, Roe? Ruff! __________________________________________________

JAMES BROWN - December 25

Papa's got a brand new (body) bag!
You still feel good, James? No, I didn't think so!
Merry Christmas - you're dead! Ow!
You're the deadest working man in show business!
(Not a good month to have the last name of Brown.)
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GERALD FORD - December 26

Keep falling down on Nixon in hell, Mr. Fake Swine-Flu!
(Not a good month to have the last name of Ford.)
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SADDAM HUSSEIN - December 29

They always said Sodom Insane used to stretch things way too far.
But we didn't think that would also include his neck!
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= WELL, THAT'S ALL FOR THIS YEAR, FOLKS! BUT STAY TUNED - YOU KNOW THE GRIM REAPER AIN'T DONE WITH THOSE CELEBS YET! MEANWHILE, ON THE UPPER RIGHT YOU CAN ALWAYS CHECK OUT THE
LIST OF LATE LAMENTED LAYABOUTS FROM OTHER YEARS! ENJOY! =