2001

RAY WALSTON - January 1

My Favorite Martian made it to the 21st Century!
(Just by one day, but he still made it.)
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LES BROWN - January 4

Is now six feet down.
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GREGORY CORSO - January 17

Now he's dead, even more so.
(From left: Corso, Allen Ginsberg and William S. Burroughs.)
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DALE EVANS - February 7

Happy trails to you, too, cowgirl cutey,
and you also had a curvy booty.
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HOWARD W. KOCH - February 16

Walter Matthau did a nice biography of him in Kotch.
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WILLIAM H. MASTERS - Feb. 16

(Left to right - sex doctors Virginia Johnson, Wlilliam Masters.)
Ginnie just lost her Masters's Johnson.
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DALE EARNHARDT SR. - February 18

THE INSIDE LANE-CHEATER
This crooked hick died blocking cars so his kid could win.
Neither of 'em did.
Now he's rotting away in hell for his stupid sin.
(That's why they don't call it "NICECAR.")
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EDDIE MATHEWS - February 18

Wasted on the Braves hitting hundreds of homers.
Shoulda played for the Yanks or Dodgers - whatta gomer.
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STANLEY KRAMER - February 19

This director was a holy rebel.
That's why he never feared the devil.
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ROSEMARY DECAMP - February 20

Loved That Rose.
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BILL RIGNEY - February 20

Former Angels manager joins the real angels.
But the Angels never won the Series
until after you died, dude.
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WILLIAM HANNA - March 2

Say hi to Joey B. for us.
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MORTON DOWNEY JR. - March 12

He also told the Grim Reaper to kiss his ass!
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ROBERT LUDLUM - March 12

Another nauseating N.Y. Times List fiction fatty falls over.
(Now for Clancy, Koontz and Grisham.)
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ANN SOTHERN - March 15

Hopefully her soul went northern.
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"PAPA" JOHN PHILLIPS - March 18

Gone to give Cass a pat on the ass.
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NORMA "HIGH VOICE" MACMILLAN - March 21

Was the voice of TV's Casper The Friendly Ghost, Gumby
and Sweet Polly Purebread of The Underdog Show. She was 79.
(COD: Heart attack.)
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ED "BIG DADDY" ROTH - April 4

Make that Dead "Big Daddy" Roth, Car-Toons fans.
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BROTHER THEODORE - April 5

Made even Professor Irwin Corey seem normal.
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BEATRICE STRAIGHT - April 7

Now she's a bit too straight..
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WILLIE STARGELL - April 9

Pirate finds treasure in heaven. Film at 11.
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JOEY RAMONE - April 15

Rock-rock-rock,
rock-n-roll DIE school!
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MICHAEL RITCHIE - April 16

Ain't bein' a dead director a bitchie?
(COD: Prostate cancer.)
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HAPPY HAIRSTON - May 1

Still happy, smart guy?
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CLIFF "NOTES" HILLEGASS - May 5

Didn't have your notes prepared for this, did ya?
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DEBORAH WALLEY - May 10

Scratch one fake Gidget.
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DOUGLAS ADAMS - May 11

So long, and thanks for all the hitch (hiking).
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PERRY COMO - May 12

You can cancel his bromo.
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JASON "EXORCIST PRIEST" MILLER - May 13

(Left, with Max Von Sydow.)
It's almost devilish how that ancient Sydow dude outlived him.
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WHITMAN "GRADY" MAYO - May 22

One stiff Sidekick And Son actor.
And hold the... nevermind.
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VICTOR KIAM - May 27

He liked hell so much he bought a condo there.
(With his relative Omar?)
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ARLENE FRANCIS - May 31

What's My Flatline?
(From left: Francis, Bennett Cerf, Dorothy Kilgallen
and What's My Llne host John Charles Daly.)

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HANK KETCHAM - June 1

Now even that li'l devil Dennis can't fetch 'im.
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IMOGENE COCA - June 2

Looks like she's gone like a choke-ah.
And hail Caesar - he always pleased 'er.
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ANTHONY QUINN - June 3

At last done in.
(Real tough to get roles, being
Selznick's son-in-law. huh, Tony baby?)
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JOHN HARTFORD - June 4

Bluegrass songwriter, fiddle and banjo player
who wrote Gentle On My Mind.
He also founded the music genre of "Newgrass",
whatever the heck that means.
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CARROLL O'CONNOR - June 21

Ah geez, looks like Archie's a goner.
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JOHN LEE HOOKER - June 21

How, how, how, how - did a one-note weasel
like you stay alive for so damn long?
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JACK LEMMON - June 27

Sour name, sweet actor.
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CHET ATKINS - June 30

Now trying his guitar pick on a harp.
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MIMI FARINA - July 18

Wife of Richard Farina and younger sister of Joan Baez.
Fine folk singer and humanitarian.
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EUDORA WELTY - July 23

Now all those hideous welts don't matter.
Won the Pulitzer Prize for writing The Optimist’s Daughter.
We wonder if the daughter ever wrote back.
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LORENZO MUSIC - August 4

This is Carlton, your deadman.
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MAUREEN REAGAN - August 8

Just got a radio talk show syndicated in Helltown.
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JANE GREER - August 24

Now you're in the black, film noir dear.
(No relation to Dabbs.)
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CHRISTIAAN BARNARD - September 2

The heart doctor is in... heaven.
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TROY DONAHUE - September 2

Boy Goner-blue.
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JUSTIN "COOKIN' CAJUN" WILSON - September 6

Yep, he's one croaked cook - I gar-own-tee!
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DOROTHY MCGUIRE - September 13

Doornail McGoner.
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FRED DE CORDOVA - September 15

And so eternal night closes in on the former Tonight Show director.
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SAMUEL Z. ARKOFF - September 16

He spooked the world and got off.
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ISSAC STERN - September 22

This guy was always very dangerous -
a major cause of violins in the streets.
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HERB BLOCK - October 7

The editorial toons of Herblock
cleaned many a crooked clock.
(Passed on at age 91, six weeks
after his last published cartoon.)
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HERBERT ROSS - October 9

Heavy-hitting director - a true loss.
(Not a good week to be named Herb.)
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KEN KESEY - November 10

One Flies Up To His Heavenly Nest.
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BO BELINSKY - November 23

Bo's now pitching in an even lower place than usual.
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GEORGE HARRISON - November 29

Currently recording for Dead Horse Records.
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JOHN KNOWLES - November 29

A Separate Plot.
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FOSTER BROOKS - December 20

Wow, that boring fake drunk finally ex-exp-expire...
(hic!) croaked!
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NIGEL HAWTHORNE - December 26

Another big-shot Brit-twit actor bites it.
Care for another spot of funeral wake tea, old chap?
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EILEEN HECKART - December 31

Deceased as heck skirt.
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JULIA PHILLIPS - December 31

She'll Never Eat Peter At The Pearly Gates, Amen.
(Same day as Heckart.
Happy New Year, girls!)
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= WELL, THAT'S ALL FOR THIS YEAR, FOLKS! BUT STAY TUNED - YOU KNOW THE GRIM REAPER AIN'T DONE WITH THOSE CELEBS YET! MEANWHILE, ON THE UPPER RIGHT YOU CAN ALWAYS CHECK OUT THE
LIST OF LATE LAMENTED LAYABOUTS FROM OTHER YEARS! ENJOY! =